Ever since I grew up, I became a person who look at the root of the problem.
Yes. And it seems that someone who is much older and experienced then me failed to do that.

Someone knew he was the root of the problem, causing so many protests against him,

so many demonstrations to oppose him and want him to step down,

creating inconvenience for people in order to put some sense into his mind,

but since he didn’t really was civilized, didn;t really have clean hand, is a heartless murderer,

he probably be selfish and doesnt care anything but himself. he probably doesn’t mind about people, but continues to be in his position even if the whole FXXking world dies, he probably still want to hole that power. He still maybe willing to scarifice the whole country for his own benefit.

This kind of people should be eliminated from society.
Those people who could not even think for others, but only themselves

The whole does not exist to serve you, and you are not even honourable or a figure to respect.
I use my education background as a Postgraduate student to justify my intelligence that a person like you ought to appear in DeathNote, to have your name written there!

Would you just stop craeting more problem? If you just quit and stop acting so superior, (you didn’t even graduate from Overseas, you scumbag! Your English is in the level of eight years old kids) maybe if you die, the death god might put you to hell…. for your blood shed u commited decades ago!

If you continue to harm citizens and would not accept that protesters are protesting against you, you probably need to go back and be reborn. God must really love people like you. There are so many of you around.

I HOPE ONE DAY SOMEONE GONNA TAKE THE DOG OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!

http://www.tokyograph.com/news/id-3710

This is taken from Tokyograph

Reports have come in that 18-year-old actor Yuya Yagira was hospitalized early Friday morning after an apparent suicide attempt. Yagira had attempted to overdose on drugs in his Tokyo apartment, but someone called emergency assistance and he was taken to a hospital. His condition is said to currently be stable.

_________________________________________

Why does such a young actor who is so successful like Yagira wanted to such things?
His popularity is going really well, being only 18 and had achieved such admiration all over the globe, yet he wanted to end his life. He is not the only first actor who does that though.

Expectations. Expectations. Expectations.
Once one had climbed up to a position that a high, people wanted more and more expectations of that individual when it was at his limit.
We are not the sky that we can always climb up, everyone has their limits as well.
To push someone like this, will only push them to a corner that they really wanted to die.

Didn’t Toda Erika said that too? She was so tired, and people were expecting things from her. She wanted to die. (Cartoon Kat-tun 40)

Why does popular people think this way?

Just think this clearly. When our parents are expecting us to achieve something, we don’t want them to see our failure. We need to win that achievement. But popular idols and actors takes a step way beyond us. We are expecting of them too. Even though we are supporting them, they didn’t want to upset us. So they tried their best. In the end, they are the one who ended up suffering all on their own.

What should be done? How can society stop repressing individuals like this? Why does society expected so much of us and gets upset with us?

This is one of the reasons why suicide still exists.
In Japan, which has one of the highest rates of suicide, might expected too much from this indidvidual. If only the society lets go and welcome freedom to one’s life.

If one society stop having too much expectations….
I guess the suicide rates shall decrease.

I hope Yagira-kun will be alright. After this, I hope he would not suffer like this all alone anymore.
Even though I do not know him that well, i just hope he doesn;t have to push himself any further.
Suicicds does not only mean attention seeking…..but it really means an individual who wanted to tend his suffering in this world that has been too heavy for them, the walls closing on them, the why sky is clashing onto them.

Yagira-kun….please don’t push yourself…..
Please take care of yourself, and whatever  reasons for why you did this,
I hope you can understand that life is really precious
Please let go some of your worries, and look at the positive reasoning of life.
You are still young, and there are thousand of things you can learn.
If you fail, i think fans will understand.
Don;t push yourself if you can no longer climb up the sky.

angelofdevotion deshita

Yes….After a whole loads of romantic writings I have been doing….
I decided to get a bit serious in this post….

I felt that I betrayed my penname which i used to only write.
I have been revealing about my poetic side with the angelofdevotion name, and left my penname alone…She must be really upset though since she is the one who dedicate like around 30 poems (for Tesshi)
I hope my pen name still remains confidential…..
I will use that name to debut my first novel.

Anyway back to my serious discussion topics.
Nothing about entertainment.

(more…)

I really love to sing…….even though my voice is NOT that good…

I tried my best desu!

The Ai Nante song of Tegoshi is sooo good….

So I decided to abuse it. By singing it.
Hahaha

There are no instruments…. My voice is apparently quite high… so The real song will make my voice disappear……by being low…

So It’s live, and consist of.. Only my voice.

Ai Nante COVER

Douzo.

Back with more lyrics!

Since I am not used to write adult themes or adult love songs….
(adult as in mature, not adult in a perverted way)
I am going to stick to my romanticist side so it would not be a downfall like
“going to the club and saw you sipping from the glass of wine..”

Being Without You

The song from the winter trees
Sang a soft melody to warm our hearts…
The warmth from your jacket,
Can’t beat the warmness that my heart feels
Two couple’s footsteps on the soft, white snow
Stays engraves until the snow melts away

The dusk arrives, you walked me home
“Tomorrow, Let’s meet again”
Your lips shaped into a gentle smile.
I nodded my head, and return a smile
Inside my heart, I am in despair….
“What if tomorrow would never comes”….

I watch your shadow slowly disappear into the mist
Tears started to roll down, without intentions….
Without you, I never knew I would break into pieces…

Tell me what I would do if I truly lost you…
What would I do if my day ends without you…
I would miss each smile you send to me….
I would sacrifice it all…..
Just to be buried into your warm arms again….
Kimi ga daisuki yo~

The Sunlight shines into my eyes..
The warmness of the heat opens my eyes…
I still hear the melody of the winter trees
The footsteps we once left had melted away
The tree i planted on the day without you…
Shall lives until the coming Fall….

The stars that shines the night skies
whispers to me a sweet lullaby
“You could stand on your own…”
I was certain, that I could survive on my own
Inside my mind I try to erase you….
“I could be on my own…even without you”

The steps that draw close to me
Are the sounds that I have heard before
Tears drained straight from my heart, My body has turned numb

“I never left you….” you whispered to my ears
The dreams we once shared returned…..
How I missed those smiles you once gave me…
How much I have longed for that warmth.
To be buried in your arms once again….
Brings a smile to my face again….
But your presence…..was never there……

__________________________________________

KOWAI!

This song is so scary…… well…
Let me explain it.

First of all….. This couple had a date during winter… They were all lovey dovey.. and the guy sends the girl home…. or vice versa…( the girl walks the guy home?????) oops

anyway.. this person knew somethign was going on…. she senses that tomorrow would never come…
That the next verse, she talks about the tree that she plants,… in memory of him..
That it was summer…she thought she might get over him.. when she saw him again…
The whisper, thw touch the warmth she felt again……
but the problem is…. this is what she feels… but his presence was not there…

which means his ghost visits her!!!

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

SCARY!
I would love to write this in Japanese….. but i can’t,

SAD I KNOW!

Made a new look to my blog!!!
I don;t know why I love black soooo much….
And it totally contrast with Tegoshi’s angelic banner
well if you really analyze it deep enough,
BASICALLY, TEGOSHI is the sky, the light which shines out so brightly….
my world is in darkness… and my words of a total M type,
soo…..Tegoshi is showering me love!!!!

YEAH!
Get it ???

It is my super “wanting to write poem so much that i had to write one no matter how busy i am” stage of life.
Since I am being inspired… why not? Right?
Okay…

Sitting by the window,
Watching the sunset
Viewing the last beam of sunlight
that shines the sky today

The stars are out to shine
Silence is the only noise
In that silence I called your name
But you never heard my voice

What should I do for you to look back at me,
What should I do to let my voice be heard

Would I need to climb to the highest mountain,
To climb up to see your smile…
Do I need to dive in the deepest ocean.
To find a way to reach out to you?

Before the sand clock drowns me with the loss of hope…
I would rather burn myself in the fire of passion,
The flames may reach out to you…
Even though I am gone…
At least in your lifetime……
you know that there is someone who loves you this much.

____________________
Run out of ideas out of a sudden…
hahaha

well………
Tegoshi-kun……. I just hope one day you would hear my voice….

angelofdevotion

This is my inspiration to write some lyrics, without melody…just yet haha
____________________

The lights of the city brightens
Inviting dusk to reign the skies
Walking in the club to meet you again,
I saw you sitting there
Sipping from the glass of wine…

I could not hold my smile any longer,
With the sight of you,
my heart beats faster
The world i stood on, seems so small
Compared to the love I have for you…

I took my steps, closer to you,
Your beautiful eyes, looked at me
That gentle smile that I couldn’t forget

As the music started to play,
You held my hand, to the dance floor
Your warm hands upon my skin,
your eyes devouring my soul,
The soft whispers through my ears…
Tell me why I should let you go..

Please give me your love,
Send me a smile to melt my soul,
The sweet lips tastes of wine
The body that held close to mind…
The warmth of your love,
The tender of your touch…
I could sink into the sea of love
But Tell me why I should let you go….

The clock strikes twelve
I won’t turn back,
I will always be ready to reveal
Every single cell in me…..
Let me see the world you see…
Let me be forever in love with you…
So Tell me why I have to let you go…

The sweetness of your words,
The caring glitter of your eyes
The melodious voice when you talk,
And the gentle love you have given me…
All that engraves into my skin…
Forever this heart belongs to you…
This is why, I will never let you go…

_______________

This is pretty lame!!
But then, yeah….. its kinda…. nice….though.. to say it to someone..
But its not so ero nee…
I am not a erohime…..even though Tesshi is an eroji…
yep…

Well….at first, I thought Tegoshi……(again) was so much liked by people
He just has to appear in the top voting chart of J-spy magazine in Thailand..
and i am surprised some people didn’t like him…..

I find myself in him.
Self-centered, spoiled, animated, romanticist, no afraid to express those cheesy lines….
Well… That is what I really am…. I am so spoiled by being the youngest in the family, and you know….even some little cousin I didn’t ask for takes the food that I like instead of me eating it everytime for 22 years, (21 actually) I was so mad and annoyed by that!
*pissed off while thinking of it*

How can I not be? Crab Eggs are the most wonderful things in the world…..
And if I always eat it, it has to be the same, unless there is some special guest YET he is not a guest….he is a cousin that I didn;t ask for, so the special dish is still MINE.
I don;t really care…..I put myself before others at home…
Yea, I know I am a damn SELF CENTERED person who hates to lose to anyone, and doesn’t like anyone who shines brighter than I do, unless she and me has the same qualities, we wouldn’t be rivals.

I got to admit. I got bad qualities too….
Yeah… tend to be a bit manipulative, but still… Tegoshi could be a male version of me, minus the looks. I am not as good looking as him…
As for my voice…. i have to say I love my voice…but since I never had voice training… I can;t reach lower notes… HAHAHAH

Another thing about me is being a romanticist. Without being a hypocrite.
I can be sacastic, but if i dislike someone…. I really don;t force myself in saying I LOVE someone! UNLESS i am in a situation where the collective loves tht person, I just have to keep quiet….
But then i wanna say….

I DON’T LOVE JIN. He is okay to me..I can watch his dramas and stuff, but one thing i can;t stand about him is why is he so irresponsible? Can he be more serious and into his career rather than to run for his escape to learn English when he came back and you can see only a few improvements? Didn;t help much. Yamapi in Kurosagi could speak english more understandable then him.

Tegoshi won;t be that. He loves his career and he had hardships while travelling on it. So i bet my head, that he won;t be stupid to do anything as silly as Jin. If he does, I might really stop liking Tegoshi…but he won;t… i just know it!

Furthermore, Tegoshi is Tegoshi.. who cares if Jin dislikes him? Jin dislikes… several people….
Even if the whole world dislikes Tegoshi, I would still like him as long as he is responsible, cute, and has a nice voice……if Tegoshi appears in scandals… it will hurt me alot, but then, Tegoshi is still Tegoshi…
I like him no matter what…

Tegoshi is human too…. even he is God to me..
Who says God never made mistakes…
He does too.. he made loads of stupid people and evil crooks on earth, or made Lucifer made them do that or stuff like this, or whatever….. so God made mistakes too…

Tegoshi could make mistakes as well..
I will support him always!

Well, through all the hardships that an idol has to face, from how he has to feel awkward in a group, when he had just entered the circle for 10 months, to how much he shines right now, he had faced such experiences.. that had made him stronger, brighter and shine brightly in the sky…

This song, lyrics written by me, and melody… I donlt know….. I just sang it naturally along with the lyrics, so if it happens to be similar to any song, please do tell me, so i can credit someone for the melody,

yet here it goes. Tegoshi Yuya, This song was written for you, and no matter how hard it is to reach for the dream, I will always support you always!!! This song could also to dedicate to anyone who wants to enter the idol industry…. its difficult, I know… but its your dream…… Hope you like this.

SHINE by Eva Veeravanitkul (aka angelofdevotion)
(Link to audio clip
Shine

Lyrics

Even though there is no light
To the path you’re walking on,
Someday, you can be sure
That the light would shine back onto you

No matter how hard it is,
To climb up to the sky,
To reach for the light
That you are yearning for…

And every step that you take,
Might pull you down again,
Never give up, and reach for the dream you will achieve
You will then prove that in no time
you could be the one..
Shining up there just like the others….

Sometimes you feel like that you
Have fought for this alone
That can’t be true because I am
Always there for you

Even though how dark the road
That you have to travel on
To reach for your dreams
That you are hoping for.

And every step that you take,
Might pull you down again,
Never give up, and reach for the dream you will achieve
You will then prove that in no time
you could be the one..
Shining up there just like the others….

And for every tear that you shed
Would just be an obstacle in life.
Never hold back, cry if it makes you stronger
Then you come to realise
that you too could shine
Shining up there, brighter than others.

You will be there,,, shining brightly with your smile.

Hope one day… Tegoshi will hear this song…and understand it… ( come on.. i am using really easy english here) and My voice may not be that great but you know… i have tried…

Maybe after studying Japanese… I will release a Japanese version… which means… 3 years from now!
ahahah

angelofdevotion deshita