I wrote this post around end of last year.

http://angelofdevotion.wordpress.com/2008/12/12/the-ideals-2008/

And my ideals have not yet changed.
The only thing I would like to include is, The person must not be sexist.

I cannot stand those kind of people.

God. I love my blog. I love my outspoken ideas, and i need a change of place.
I don’t want to be the nail that needs to be hammered down all the time.

In Thailand, I am already half bended from being hammered down too much.
I hold to my independence and individuality, I have unique ideas to life…………….and that creates who I am……..

My Japanese classes are getting more and more difficult!!!!
But I am never gonna give up. I never want to give up. This is a dream I want to achieve, I want a PhD to climb up the ladder, and a PhD to actually show that I am capable of fulfilling what I want. I just want to be someone who people will see me as a someone. Moreover, loads of people are getting Masters and it seems that it worth less than it used to. Therefore, I want to climb up to the highest place just to make my life somewhat, valuable.

Now, On to my destined topic. “Heart or Head”

Notice that I put Heart before Head and it does not mean I am using my heart more than my head. I believe that my heart guides me where I want to be, but once I am on that path, i need to look before I leap and think with my head to make things the best I can.

My dream is to be a novelist. But that cannot be achieved. I need something more realistic. Like be a professor is more of a “reality” then a novelist. Novelist is what my heart desires, professor is what my head tells me i should do to be socially accepted. That is my head for the path to the future I am walking on. But what would it be like when it comes to things like relationship???

Ha, who am I to even say when I am not in one?
Head sounds better to me though. That is where reasons come out from. With only the heart, you are gonna suffer alot from the various doubts you have, but with the head, you are being able to at least be sensible and logical.But the heart is actually the one that brings you into a relationship. Too much of the head in selecting someone would be more of “selecting some one who you can take advantage of and live together” and too much of the heart would be “i am not thinking anything else at all, apart from, I like this person and I don’t see it further into the future”

Head and Heart need to fusion one another, and you can choose to love a person who you feel attached or comfortable with, but you got to use your head to think, “Is this the person you think you can live your whole life with? Is this the person who you want to share the same roof and would always be there for her?”

Wait a minute. I am going too far. People have different categories for girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands and wives. Please excuse my seriousness.

For girlfriends and boyfriends, I guess, heart is more of the device they use.
God. I should just stop writing this topic.
I am such a serious person, so actually if i were in a relationship, I would actually think of the far far future. I have a 5 year plan ahead of everything I do, to make sure I don’t get panicked when I have no back-up plan.

Sigh……where did my inspiration went again?

I need some stimulation in life, really…